You know how much it breaks my heart to write this. I love you more than life itself, and I love Margaret even more than that, which is hard to believe is even possible. However, we can have no false hopes about tomorrow. What I have to do will most likely kill me.
No, I said no false hopes. What I have to do tomorrow will kill me. I don’t mind though, I know that I will protect you, Angela, and most importantly Margaret, with my actions. Your lives (and the lives of all the other Magels) are easily worth mine. I know that in your head you agree with me, although I know in your heart you do not want to see me go.
The reason this letter is so hard to write is because by the time you read this, I will already be gone. I know you and Angela want to come and help me, but I know if you do, you’ll be dead too. That cannot happen.
Try to keep Margaret calm. I know she will be very upset when I don’t come home after a while. How do you explain death to a two-year-old? I’m sorry—I guess in some ways I get the easy end of this all here. Try to tell her good things about me, and never, ever let her doubt how much I love her. I will love her until the day she dies, and beyond. Please, keep her safe.
Please, don’t let Angela stay mad at me for too long. I understand that she will be mad me, because that’s how she has always dealt with things she doesn’t, but don’t let her stay that way. She’ll regret hating me later. I know it. Remind her that I love her like the sister I always wished I could have. Remind her that she has a very special place in my heart.
And Quinn. Oh my Quinn. You have no idea how blessed I feel to have you in my life. I never thought that I would have anyone in my life to love the way that I loved you, and I was sure that no one would ever love me the way you love me. Quincy Alexander, as far as I am concerned, you are the best thing to have ever happened in the entire world. Thank you for being my everything.
Don’t worry about moving on if you get lonely. It’s hard to be alone. I was alone for so long, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I will never doubt how much you love me. All I ask is that you don’t forget me. I don’t truly believe you will. To be honest, I don’t believe you can.
Well, this is it. If I don’t leave now, I’m not sure I will ever have the courage to. I know you’ll miss me, and I’m sure I’ll miss you too. Try to live a happy life without me anyways. Call it my dying wish, if it makes it easier for you to try.
All my love and all my hope,