The only fear that it took me a while to understand was the fear of hospitals. Eventually, I logically understood that people fear the loss and the bad news that can come from hospitals, or the tragic circumstances that put people in the hospital.
But I never really understood it. Hospitals for me have always been a place of safety. A place where people who knew a lot more than me were in charge. Where I didn’t have to worry about every little action making my loved ones worse. The doctors and the nurses took care of the making people better, and even when we got bad news, I still knew that I had done everything I could by getting to a hospital. I’d never have to wonder if the bad news could have been avoided through an action on my part.
So, even when I was the one in the bed, waiting for the test results, I felt a sense of calm. They’d take care of me here, and I wouldn’t have to worry about the ‘what ifs’ if I hadn’t come.